


I won...

by FateFeather



Series: AUs From Last Night [2]
Category: The Avengers - Ambiguous Fandom
Genre: Drunk!Howard, Drunk!Tony, Gen, Young!Tony
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-30
Updated: 2015-03-30
Packaged: 2018-03-20 11:26:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3648573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FateFeather/pseuds/FateFeather
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>...the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight. </p><p>Please check the tags and note the warnings for this story.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I won...

**Author's Note:**

> AU where Howard, Maria, and Jarvis, are still alive during Tony's childhood but are pretty much the same.
> 
> Triggers: Underage drinking, general drunkenness, and bodily functions.

Anyone who knew Tony Stark wouldn’t be surprised to learn he could hold his drink in any contest. He’d taken down frat boys in the first month of being in college with enough of a gap for those guys to be ashamed they lost to a teenager. It didn’t matter at house parties and ragers that Tony was too young to be that good at drinking. Nobody would turn away the richest kid in the country. Besides, everyone who’s ever confronted Tony about it hadn’t reached 21 yet either. So that always backfired for them.

 

But being a legend on campus still compared nothing when it came to being dragged into Howard’s office with a drink already poured for him in a flat bottomed glass. “Spring break.” Howard toasts, and downs his in one. Tony wants to roll his eyes, but knows better. He picks up the glass, and doesn’t pretend not to know what to do with it. He slings it back as easily and without any wince at the flavour. “Better than being made in a dorm room.” Howard speaks with a joyless smile. Tony swallows back the last of the taste of the scotch, almost unsure what to say. It’s almost hilarious in its bad characterisation of the Stark boy. Tony Stark left without a quip? Unheard of.

 

Still, Tony does have something to say. “I want to go with everyone.” He holds his dad’s stare, trying to act like the man he’s supposed to be. Only, he wants to be a teenager. This is his only chance for the college experience. It wasn’t affecting his grades in the slightest. Tony knew a work hard play hard ethic was only fair. He shouldn’t be expected to be Howard right now. The guy was still here. Tony knew he’d be learning the business. He’d been learning it every summer between school. So one quick spring break shouldn’t reflect the rest of his life.

 

“No.” Howard replies, his similar eyes narrowing just a little the second Tony parts his lips to protest. Any kid Tony’s age might have complained, might have grunted or slammed a door or two. Tony grabs the bottle and pours another drink. He pours one for Howard too.

 

“Why?” He asks, and drinks this glass at a conversational speed.

 

“Three reasons: You’re too young to be partying in public. You’re my son. I can’t have security keep an eye on you at a beach full of half-naked bodies. Not that I don’t trust them, but no money in the world will stop middle aged men staring at young girls in bikinis.” Howard shrugs unapologetically.

 

Tony finishes his drink before Howard does. Sensing the way this is becoming a competition, Howard keeps up and drains his second glass. “I’m already drinking, I’m not in the official spotlight for the tabloids yet, and if you know no money stops them, why hire them at all?” Tony realises a little too late he’s got his hand still wrapped around the bottle. He puts it back on the desk, only to watch as Howard swipes it back and pours a third.

 

Tony knew things start to get a little dangerous when Howard really drinks. The old man doesn’t have glassy eyes yet, but when he does, it only goes one of two ways. Tony didn’t want that to happen when there was nobody else around. “Mom’s waiting.” Tony says.

 

“Is that why you came in here?” Howard asks. “You’re the messenger for Jarvis now?” Tony accepts the third drink pushed his way, drinking it to silence his own cutting reply. Because Tony hasn’t been himself, Howard stands, and walks for the door with his half glass. “Fine, better get something to eat anyway.” He’s talking to himself, but Tony cuts in anyway.

 

“The rest of the family’s here.” He sounds actually happy about it, and for a moment Howard seems a little less insufferable.

 

“Even Eddy?”

 

“Yup.”

 

“That’s yes, Tony. Don’t talk like that.” It’s only because Howard’s back is turned that Tony rolls his eyes when he echoes back the correct way to agree with the old man.

 

* * *

 

“Hey, college taught you a thing or two!” Uncle Edward cheers over the dinner table. Who knows when it became shots, but Tony and Howard are being poured their glasses expertly by Jarvis, and the rest of the family are watching with both bemusement and enjoyment.

 

Tony doesn’t really know how many drinks he’s had, but it must’ve been something when he hears his mom say “that’s enough.” With the same desperation she has when she knows Tony’s made a show of himself in front of people they can’t call their friends.

 

“It’s enough when one of us passes out.” Howard grunts back at his wife. Tony would be upset at the way he talks to her in front of everyone, but he’s too drunk to really let the tone set in or take offense.

 

“It’ll be you.” Tony slurs, but he can hear himself slurring, so that means he’s still sober… Right?

 

“The hell it will.” Howard is glassy eyed, just like Tony knew he would be. He’s got a little bit of his last drink in his moustache, so subconsciously Tony rubs at the weak patch of fluff he calls his beard, and pulls back a wet hand. So, maybe he wasn’t beating his dad yet. The guy had experience, but Tony had youth.

 

“I don’t know Howard, the kid’s not slowing down.” Eddy interjects again, and Tony laughs a little as his Uncle takes his side.

 

“Inherited too many of my genes.” Howard counters, but he’s right, Tony isn’t wobbling in his seat, and he isn’t struggling to drink the alcohol put in front of him. Howard’s holding off, not wanting to drink. Who’d have thought his son would surpass him in drinking first? It wasn’t something the older Stark thought he should be feeling proud about, but he was.

 

“Gonna call it?” Tony goads on, holding on to his long since empty glass. There’s laughter in the kid’s eyes, and Howard can’t deny that if the boy could still have his wits about him like this, then spring break probably wouldn’t end up causing any fuss.

 

“Alright. I give.” Howard grunts, the glass slipping from his hand and being caught by Jarvis before it falls off the edge of the table. Tony receives applause from his Uncle, thankfully missing his mother’s angry expression for having this go on for so long.

 

Tony stands to go give his old man a handshake, only to fall flat on his ass, unconscious.

 

“Aw, too bad Howard. The boy could have been here all spring.”

 

“Ah.” Howard shrugs off the fact he’s lost, annoyed, but still stupid with booze. “He’s only young once.” He makes to stand as well, experienced enough to know he won’t end up on the floor next to his son. “Besides… The hangover will be punishment enough for all this foolishness.”

 

“Foolishness you were also involved in, sir.” Jarvis quietly reminds his boss as he grabs young Tony up and encourages him to try walking. Howard only laughs as the two move to Tony’s room where the genius can sleep it off.

 

All in all, it wasn’t the worst family get together by a long shot, and in the morning, next to Tony’s glass of water, scrawled in Howard’s writing on a yellow circle is: _Drunkest Person At A Family Event - First Prize_.

 

Tony laughs up to the point where he vomits on the carpet.

 

He does not get to go to spring break with his friends.


End file.
